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When we first moved to Haiti, we had great big dreams that required a lot of faith, which led us to pray great big prayers—prayers that many times seemed left unanswered and caused us to wrestle with why we should even bother to dream at all. Sometimes the only thing that felt constant was that God would never leave us nor forsake us.
I have always been motivated to do more, and I feel most alive when I am in Haiti, seeing the people I love and meeting them where they are in their struggles and pain. Dreams come to life when I can help someone in need, and I find myself praying continuously when I am sitting with a friend in the village and hear her stories of how she struggles to provide enough food for her family.
Lately I have felt defeated, frustrated, lonely, and stale because I have not done any of those things for a very long time. I don’t know about you, but when my dreams are not coming to life, and my prayers feel stale, and I feel like I’m being beat down to a fine powder, I just want to quit. I find it hard to dream, and I struggle to put words together to pray. Oh, how the enemy rejoices in our pain! These are the lies he wants me to believe. He finds pleasure in those emotions that are self-perpetuated.
But the truth is God has never left me, and he will never forsake me (Deut. 31:6, Hebrews 13:5), and when I delight in the Lord, He will give me the desires of my heart (Psalm 37:4). Even in the sadness I am feeling and the staleness that I think exists, He still loves me. He is all I need to focus on the real dreams and plans He has for me.
I have had to consciously replace the lies from the enemy with the truths of God’s word and remember that a heart truly delighted in God will desire what He desires. I will love what He loves and will do what He calls me to do in every season, no matter if it lines up with MY big dreams or not, because His will is far greater than mine!
Ladies, He has given us so many tools to fight the battle and sing in victory. This particular song has been my prayer, my battle cry. I pray that it touches your heart and that it can be an anthem for you when you are struggling to dream or pray.
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